Well hello. (:
Enjoy, cheerios!
Funny how sometimes when you are sure of something and you feel like you are on cloud nine and in the next minute, you stumble on something that ruins your confidence and built up doubts in yourself. Well, that's life. Whichever way you turn, you can never seems to avoid the doubtfulness in life. And I just feel so irritated having to doubt things when before I was very sure that everything will be fine and going on smoothly. My itchy hand just HAD to browse the saved documents and click on that one particular file. And voila, I'm doubting and hating myself now. ):
She: Hey, are you guys like an item or something?
He: What the shit? No..why? Hahaha
She: You have feelings for her?
He: HAHAHA
She: So what's the answer?
He: No..Hahaha..Funny ah u..HAHAHA
She: No feelings at all?
He: No feelings. Why? Does she like me?
She: I don't know.
He: Okay Whatever.
She: Ok. If she likes you, what will you do?
He: Nothing. Unless she tell me directly, then I will talk to her..IF she dare to tell me
She: What will you talk to her?
He: Privacy.
She: Tell me. Will you reject her?
He: I don't know. Probably.
She: Why would you reject her?
He: I don't know. Maybe I'm not ready. I want to explore more. Maybe she's not my type.
*Adapted. This was in 20th May. She was my friend. And He was the guy.
Just recently me and the guy had a chat. Its in early August. And it started off a normal chat which slowly change into a serious topic(not really serious) and well oh well, we talked about crushes and love and stuff. Random, I know. Well, I remember it was 4th August and that day was the happiest day of my life(not really, but Im still happy). The great relieved I felt when I knew I was not clapping on one hand. Its too awesome to be a reality but it was. Well, life are not really a fairytale. It just end there and then after we both knew our feelings due to some illogical matters. But then, all I knew was that it would be worth the wait. I am SURE that everything would be turn out fine in the end. We just had to wait for the right time.
And, today I stumbled across these convo which I've long forgotten. The words just crushed my heart and my dreams. I began to doubt his words. I began to doubt reality. Am I really in a one-sided love? Did he meant his words or was he merely trying to put hopes in me? Doubting.